For Better or Worse

Marriage and parenting in the time of COVID-19 feels like we are in the middle of an unfun, poorly scripted game show, with new fears, stressors and challenges popping up daily. My husband and I just celebrated our 9 year wedding anniversary and this year in particular, we have grown together as a couple more than ever before.

It got me thinking, what would people suggest couples attempt as the ultimate test of patience, humor, and love? What tasks or events put us deep in the trenches of reality--referencing the “worse” portion of “better or worse” in the vows? I conducted a little market research and gathered the top responses from hundreds of married Moms, in the name of reclaiming lightheartedness on the internet.

The number one answer? Assembling IKEA furniture.

For the rest, grab your partner and “discuss”.

Around the House

How they load the dishwasher

Putting up the Christmas tree

Putting together a Barbie Dreamhouse

Putting together “Santa Toys” the night before Christmas

The internet goes down

Putting up wallpaper

Budgeting

Remodeling or construction within the home of any kind.

Building a Costco play structure

Hanging pictures

Hanging curtains

The tupperware cabinet

Playing Scrabble and someone challenges a word

Packing for a trip

Packing the trunk of a full car

Attempting a professional family photo shoot

The Middle of the Night

Getting a bat out of the house

Vomit.

One of the kids wets the bed.

The batteries in the smoke detector are dying and you don’t know which one.

Listening to your partner snore while feeding the baby.

Health

Quarantining during a global pandemic with any number of children.

Labor

Listening to your partner complain how uncomfortable the chair is that they are sitting in... while you’re in labor

Food poisoning

When your child brings you a handful of poop.

Hiring a doula only to have your partner compete with them during the entire 3-day labor.

One is the caretaker and one is the patient post-surgery.

The first, second, and subsequent calls to Poison Control.

Heavy Machinery

Backing a boat trailer onto the ramp

Backing an RV into a campsite

Docking a boat

Renting a mini-excavator and hitting a gas line.

One teaching the other to drive stick

Out in the World

Shopping at IKEA

Driving in a foreign country

Navigating a two-person canoe

Navigating a two-person kayak

Changing a flat tire without cell service

Riding a tandem bicycle

Being lost in a foreign country

Needing to go to the hospital in a foreign country

A 10-hour plane ride with a toddler

If only instead of rice, we could throw out these challenges to newlyweds as they recede down the aisle, it would paint a much more realistic picture of marital bliss. But there is a secret waiting at the end of these moments, and its whispered to both, once you reach the other side.

It says, “Look what we did. Look what we survived. And we did it together.”